Year three: Beyond the comps

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For many graduate level courses the comprehensive examination (“comps”) is a pass/fail checkpoint in the program (often after mandatory coursework) that assesses knowledge and work done to date. Once passed, the student can progress to their research. Comps seem to be more common in US and Canadian higher education – and Wikipedia, that rigorous source of academic information, says that “preparing for comprehensive exams is normally both stressful and time consuming!”

Our EdD comps were last weekend and preparing for them was indeed stressful and time consuming.  We wrote a 7,500 word paper on our research ideas (and questions) to date, that included a literature review and (in some cases) details of our theoretical framework.  We had to present for 20 minutes on our paper and our work so far. A panel of six UBC professors (familiar to us from our classes) then asked us questions for 40 minutes – it was pretty much open season! I am happy to report that I did get a question on Foucault. In fact, I think I managed to dodge/deflect enough to insinuate that, yes, I was intimately familiar with his groundbreaking contribution to the history of western morality – the three-volume L’Histoire de la sexualité (in the original French of course) and it was, in fact, my regular bedtime reading.

We have been together as a cohort for 2 very long years, and we are pretty familiar with each other’s areas of interest. Some of us haven’t varied much from our original idea, and many others have taken a long and winding journey to settle on something that may not have even been a consideration back in 2015. Members of the group have changed jobs, had personal and professional crises and questioned why they are doing this in the first place! There has been crying, anger, hugging and lots and lots of reflection.  Some of us have supervisors, some have a committee, a few others are still exploring. Regardless of where we are it was a significant weekend for all of us and marked the last time we will be “officially” together as a cohort.

We’re currently waiting for our results; we may have to do some extra work on our submitted papers before we move on. Next hurdle is the proposal, after which we can finally be referred to as doctoral candidates.  After a few bad academic first dates I finally have a committee – consisting of a philosopher, a poet and a physician. I am particularly thrilled with this and I am in the process of writing a “….walks into a bar” joke so please forward any suggestions you have. They haven’t got together yet, that comes after the proposal is approved by my supervisor, but I hope that happens before the end of the summer.

So – year three begins tomorrow! It’s not an overstatement to say the last two years have been life-altering, but I think that was the point. I have gone from being acutely uncomfortable speaking up about LGBTQ issues to never shutting up about them and I can’t wait to get into the rich conversations with my participants and find out what it’s like for LGB radiation therapists working today. Stay tuned!

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Coming out: Reflections on UKRCO 2017

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So, last week I did a talk at UKRCO 2017 on “Coming Out in Healthcare”. The focus was on patients and healthcare professionals who are LGBTQ, and how we can normalise the coming out process. I had an amazing time at the conference, and met a lot of wonderful people I have so far only known on Twitter. While I was there my friend Rachel Harris gave me some wise doctoral advice – “don’t forget to write this up for your reflective portfolio”.  Not having one of those, I decided to blog it. I’ve been reading and writing (and presenting) on LGBTQ issues in healthcare for what seems forever (although realistically it can only be a year or so) – and overall had a good response. Often LGBTQ people will come up afterwards and tell me about their experiences in healthcare (some funny, some just WTAF). Many straight people will comment that it has “made them think” or the talk “opened their eyes” – which is also gratifying.  The UKRCO post-talk activity was definitely the most positive/funnest/most affirming so far.

The best part was afterwards (on Twitter as well as IRL) talking with a diverse group of people, gay, straight, differently gendered – medical imaging people, radiation therapists, managers and leaders . For example, I met a brilliant undergrad student who was volunteering at the conference and doing research on examining radiographers’ knowledge of care for trans patients. Her impetus was listening (as a first year) to how staff around her had talked about a trans woman who was being treated for prostate cancer. She wanted to change that conversation.  I think what struck me about all the interactions with LGBTQ colleagues were the things we have in common. Coming out stories were shared, some were easy – some painful to talk about even now. There was a lot of discussion about how we manage our identity at work, who knows, who doesn’t – who is cool with it and the inevitable horror stories of the times it didn’t go well (for us as well as for patients).  Most of us remembered patients who were LGBTQ that we clicked with – some of us wore rainbow lanyards, lapel pins or just gave off a strong gay vibe!  We talked about gender – and being gendered – and the difficulty of finding a sweet tailored suit (and not a cocktail dress) to rock up in for the inevitable conference gala dinner.  It was so great to be in the gay-zone and get that sense of support and affirmation – most importantly that my research is on the right track, the stuff I experienced at work hasn’t gone away, and that people are really receptive and keen to learn how to improve care for patients.

In my talk I used a clip from the fabulous Macmillan* “LGBTQ experiences of cancer care” video series where Lesley (a lesbian living with ovarian cancer) talks about her discomfort with knowing some of her nurses were lesbian but closeted. She says “it’s about equality really….” – she is out, why are they hiding that same thing from her? This prompted an interesting side discussion about “should LGBTQ staff HAVE to come out” – where I think (fairly obviously) the answer is “of course not”.  Issues ranged from legislative concerns (where we can’t discriminate against anyone based on sexual orientation etc.) to colleagues saying “well, should I wear a badge that says I am a Christian, Muslim?” One person said that “it’s about being professional” (not talking about their sexual orientation at work) – which ties into a lot of the research that shows it’s often homo, not hetero-sexuality seen as “unprofessional”.

Next week is my comprehensive exam that will assess whether I am ready for candidacy and the research part of my EdD. This week has been a gift in terms of giving me insight into what it is like “out there” and validating my topic as one that is important, relevant and likely to make a change in practice.   Now onward!

*Macmillan have some really good resources, including the recent “Supporting LGBT people affected by cancer” article and the “No one overlooked- experiences of LGBT people affected by cancer” report